Deeper Than I Thought

waking up this morning
life is so much more
than i lived
love is so much more
than ive felt
and time is so precious

digging deeper in myself
i notice the layers unfold
things ive hidden
things ive blocked away
'cause to feel. . . to feel. . .
to feel is so much more
complicated

not noticing how one event can
change
everything
around me
everything
inside of me
time is so precious

and its been three
three years of
melancholy
three years of
numb
of bitterness
i miss what it was
to feel
to feel
to feel so complicated

i miss love
i miss life
i miss what means to be
free
i miss that time